i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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