Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
