If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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