i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Randomize
