Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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