I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
