as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
my poor anus
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
