sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
