he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
