I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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