Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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