You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
