So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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