friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
