Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
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