hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize