Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
The feeling are messing with the penis
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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