I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize