Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay