tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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