dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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