you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize