if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We got so high we made milksteak
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize