Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
