I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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