you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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