batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
