This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
