last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize