I wannas sexs uuuuu
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
