I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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