I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
i used baking grease as lip gloss
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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