Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
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I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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