exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
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