He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Randomize
