and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
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I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
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My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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