My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
