I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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