I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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