Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
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