I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
