Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize