kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
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weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
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Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag