It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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