That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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