The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
