You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
