Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
