where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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