She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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