i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
